Quest Post: Coping with a Long Distance Relationship

As any magazine, television show, or chick flick will demonstrate, long distance relationships are really difficult. There is just no easy way around it. Of course, as 20-somethings, long distance relationships are common occurrences. Out of state college, semesters abroad, new jobs in different cities, and family are just a few of the factors forcing young lovers to fall asleep to a telephone call rather than in their significant other's arms at night. Coping with seeing your love only once every few months takes a toll on any individual and within any relationship no matter how strong. There are several ways to manage long distance relationships that can help couples survive the distance as well as become a better duo in the future.

Understand Each Other's Expectations

The key to any relationship is communication and understanding what your partner expects from you and from your relationship together. This point can be particularly difficult to understand for individuals embarking on a long distance love excursion. Couples in long distance relationships have to develop a game plan. Sit down with your loved one and examine exactly what it is the two of you want out of your relationship and how you are going to get it. One of the most difficult aspects of a long distance relationship is seeing an end in sight. When you and your SO are discussing a game plan be sure to communicate a goal. If you are embarking on a long distance relationship, you have to come up an end point for that distance, so that the two of you have something to strive for and look forward to.

Communicate Your Feelings

Obviously, again, this tip is essential for all relationships. However, it is particularly important for individuals to clearly communicate their feelings when they are in long distance relationships. Couples committed to one another who cannot talk face to face are at the distinct disadvantage of not being able to read nonverbal cues from their SO. This means that it is essential for long distance couples to carefully and honestly explain to one another how they are truly feeling. Being passive about your feelings is a surefire path to disaster when you are battling with hundreds of miles of distance. Talk to each other. Explain to one another exactly how you are feeling. Ask questions. Long distance relationships primarily rely on verbal communication. Make sure that you are really expressing what your SO needs to hear to make your relationship work.

Enjoy Your Independence

Lastly, as with any relationship, it is important to have a certain level of autonomy from your SO. Enjoy the time that you have to yourself and in your separate lives. Go out and do things and be active in your life away from your SO. This will not only give you valuable things to talk about when you are with or talking to your lover, but will also help you understand exactly who you are and what you want for yourself and within your relationship. Many individuals in traditional relationships fall into the pattern of smothering one another with the other's presence. By doing this, each entity within the relationship can lose sight of who they are without their SO, which (for obvious reasons) can be dangerous. Distance allows you to miss your love. Let yourself miss them, so that when you are with them it is that much better.

Long distance relationships often get a bad rep in modern popular culture. All too often, television shows and pop songs speak of long distances as the kiss of death for love. This doesn't have to be the case. Things are going to be challenging and difficult at times in any relationship. Use your time apart from one another to help your relationship grow and flourish.

This guest post is contributed by Barbara Jolie, who writes for online classes. She welcomes your comments at her email Id: barbara.jolie876@gmail.com.