I must confess I have been feeling really down lately and on my drive home from my parent's house, I realized why. I don't really have a girl best friend right now. My boy is my best friend, but that is really not the same as a girl best friend. He's in for a little gossiping, but it isn't the same. I can't go shopping with him and I feel bad making him watch super girly movies and things like that. I also consider my mom a friend, but it really isn't the same as someone my own age. She's a best friend, but she's still my mom.
This has been a problem for me since college started really. My very best friend who I've been friends with for years moved in high school and we still keep in touch, but she's not here. Same goes with all my best friends from high school who went away to school. I still talk to them and hang out with them while they're here, but the feeling of not being needed anymore grows increasingly with every visit. We are all busy so the phone calls and texts and Facebook comments are less and less. When time finally comes for vacations, I see them once or twice and have a great time, but realize that they seem to be much more involved in their school lives that don't include me.
Even the few friends I have around here at school are busy. I definitely understand because I know I'm busy too. But hanging out becomes plans weeks in advance for an hour lunch and then we don't see each other for months because of bad timing. These days, I don't even see my roomie very much. Our schedules clash, she's leaving as I'm coming, and sometimes I don't even think she wants to hang out anymore.
I guess it has just becoming increasingly clear I desperately want a girl best friend and don't have one. I love the friends I have, don't get me wrong! I have best friends, but the distance and schedules make it tough. I wish someone was here close to me, who had time for me, who I could talk to about anything. It is just a bad feeling when it feels like it is something that can't really be fixed.
Hi Lauren,
ReplyDeleteI know how u feel.. I went through that phase. My boy was my bestfriend and I used to (still do) take him with me while I go shopping.
I used to crib a lot to my boy saying I have no girl friends but I have learned to adjust and now I make the best of every situation leading me to make new friends. :)
I would suggest that you keep your eyes & ears open.. This phase will pass by and you'll make wonderful friends that you can regularly hang out with.
I think I know how you feel :/ I mean, I have my friends and I love them, but I don't have just one *best* friend that I can always turn to and always count on. Hopefully we'll both find ourselves an amazing best friend sooner or later [:
ReplyDeleteI hope we do too Natalie!
ReplyDeleteI am totally in the same situation. My boyfriend is my best friend but I really wish I had a lady who I had a similar comfort-level with. Goals for the new year for sure.
ReplyDeleteI have a boy best friend (Josh) (HE IS NOT my boyfriend just a platonic friend) We have been best m8s for a year
ReplyDeleteNow me being a bit of a tomboy perfer male companry to female company though I had a female childhood best m8 (Jess)(kinda simular to what happened to you) she moved away when I was 15 we talk sometimes but not like we had b4. But recently I have found a new connection in my current best m8 better than what me and Jess had.
I just don't feel the desire to have a best female friend I am a lad's girl yes I have a few female friends and even a couple of close female friends but not a best best friend since Jess.
And as for doing girly stuff yuck no way (thought I like doing my hair and makeup sometimes) I am not into flirts or boys (only as mates) Btw I am not a lesbien just I am not tht fenimine, and not really ready for a long term relationship yes I may look from time to time but tht is as far as it goes.
I'd rather hang with the lads and do boy stuff such as vid games or just have a simple chat, though at the same time I am not really into having a kick about or climbing about etc.
And another thing I hate is when girls bitch to each other or say "Ooh he is fit" and guys hate is too trust me it embarrises them if you shout it out loud they aint so keen on flirts eitther or if you act all giggly and girly round them.
But I suppose it is different when u r my age (most of my friends are aged between 13-16)
But it is each to their own I guess.
I most certainly can't stand girly girls so god know's how guys feel it probably makes them feel a bit you know gay if they are made to do or discuss girly stuff with their partners.
But it is each to their own I guess