Take a Step Back Before You Shout

Have you ever yelled at someone while driving? Gotten aggravated at someone walking too slow in a store? Judged someone you saw out and about that you didn't know? If you say no to any of these, you're definitely lying. We all get angry and judgmental when dealing with the outside world at times.

Have you ever been driving and accidentally cut someone off because you were upset about something else or feeling so sick your brain wasn't even working? Perhaps the person honked or flipped you off or even stalked you and yelled at you. It happens. We all make mistakes and we all get angry at others for making these same mistakes, especially while driving.

Most of the time, I try to look at it this way. These random people you get angry with... you have no idea what they're dealing with. It is impossible to control people and it is impossible to know what is going on in their heads.

Next time someone cuts you off, yells at you for no reason, takes too long to pay for their purchases in line, or whatever happens that really aggravates you; stop and take a deep breath. Think about how you don't know much about this person. You can guess certain things from their outer appearance: their age, gender, etc. But you don't know if they have a bad headache. You don't know if they are going through a bad divorce and just met with their lawyer. You don't know if they are over-thinking and nervous about something.

So stay calm and give people the benefit of the doubt and don't sweat the small stuff. Act the way you would want someone to act towards you. Don't you feel so embarrassed and horrible when you cut someone off on accident because your head hurts? Remember they probably feel the same way.

So next time before you flip out, take a breath and relax. Getting angry is just hurting you. Keeping your cool makes the world a much better place. There's no use getting your blood pressure up over something you won't even remember in a day or two.

Forgiveness is for the Strong

Ghandi once said "The weak can never forgive. Forgiveness is an attribute of the strong." Isn't that true? Isn't it much easier to fight and scream and hold a grudge? When someone hurts your feelings, at first, it makes you much happier to say mean things behind their back and to say they don't deserve your forgiveness. Perhaps they don't. Forgiveness isn't just about the other person though, it is mostly about yourself.

When you forgive someone, regardless if they apologize or if they even are sorry, you are acknowledging to yourself that you are strong. You are going to let whatever that person said or did to you roll of your back. You acknowledge that they are human and make mistakes and so do you. Forgiveness allows you to tell yourself that no one can make or break you.

After the happiness fades of holding that grudge, all you'll be left with are feelings of sadness over a lost friend or jealousy or anger. You'll feel bound to that person and only with these words: I forgive you, will you set those feelings free. You don't even have to say it to the person, you just have to mean them when you say them in your mind.

So forgive. You'll feel lighter and happier in the long run. I'll leave you with a quote from the Bible for those religious...

"For if ye forgive men their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you: But if ye forgive not men their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses."

-Matthew 6:14,1